Apocalyptic 2077 Review

Title: Apocalyptic 2077

Format: Amazon Prime Video

Year: 2019

Label: Acclaim Video

This film is a 65 minute post apocalyptic romp obviously influenced by the Italian Mad Max / Escape from New York rip offs such as Escape from the Bronx, Warriors of the Lost World etc. The main difference being that this film was shot on a pocket money budget and it's from the UK. 

What this lacks in budget, it makes up for in charm. It's like Shaun of the Dead meets Book of Eli.

Our unlikely hero is an agoraphobic weather station technician, who finds himself trapped in a bunker for 8 years after 99% of the population are wiped out in a nuclear war.

  

Jack's only friend, the weather station's AI computer, discovers some information that could save the world! It's Jack's job to find what's left of civilisation and deliver this most vital information to those who can help.

 

The acting is a real mixed bag, but the quirkiness just adds to the charm of this movie. The usual post apocalyptic tropes are included such as cannibals, cyberpunk gangs and zombies, but the world building here is amazing considering the measly budget. There is a Bladerunner style city scene that looks great and some really great desert wasteland scenes.

The direction and camera work is solid, so too is the lighting. In particular, the audio is very impressive, something that usually lets down a lot of low to no budget features. The story is nothing amazing, but it never feels slow and there is always something weird and wonderful to look at.  

This movie is not for the average movie goer. If you are expecting a Mad Max style production then you will be sorely disappointed. This one is for trash fans only. That being said, it's only 65 mins so even if you are not usually a trash cinema / grindhouse fan, you might find this a fun way to kill an hour. I thoroughly enjoyed it an can say I am honestly looking forward to a sequel!

UK Films Rating: 7/10
Release Rating: 7/10
Did James like it? Yes

10 AMAZON PRIME MOVIES TO STREAM ON HALLOWEEN

TROLL HUNTER ( 2010 )

A group of students investigates a series of mysterious bear killings, but learns that there are much more dangerous things going on. They start to follow a mysterious hunter, learning that he is actually a troll hunter.

THEATRE OF BLOOD ( 1973 )

A Shakespearean actor takes poetic revenge on the critics who denied him recognition. 

I SAW THE DEVIL ( 2010 )

A secret agent exacts revenge on a serial killer through a series of captures and releases.

THE WITCH ( 2015 )

A family in 1630s New England is torn apart by the forces of witchcraft, black magic and possession. 

SOUTHBOUND ( 2015 )

Five interlocking tales of terror follow the fates of a group of weary travellers who confront their worst nightmares - and darkest secrets - over one long night on a desolate stretch of desert highway.

DON'T GO IN THE HOUSE ( 1979 )

A disturbed young man who was burned as a child by his sadistic mother stalks women with a flamethrower. 

TOXIC APOCALYPSE ( 2016 )

Gangsters, toxic hobos, shady agents, clown killers, badly dressed desperado chavs, a renegade swat team, street thugs, mad scientists, a news reporter out for blood, a town full of hatred and monster with a taste for dismemberment. Welcome to Haven Port City - It's wrong on so many levels.

ALL THE BOYS LOVE MANY LANE ( 2006 )

A group of high-schoolers invite Mandy Lane, an innocent, desirable girl, to a weekend party on a secluded ranch. While the festivities rage on, the number of revelers begins to drop mysteriously. 

SPLINTER ( 2008 )

Trapped in an isolated gas station by a voracious Splinter parasite that transforms its still living victims into deadly hosts, a young couple and an escaped convict must find a way to work together to survive this primal terror.

TROLL ( 1986 )

A wicked troll king in search of a mystical ring that will return him to his human form invades a San Francisco apartment complex where a powerful witch lives. 

Bridge of Dragons Movie Review

Title: Bridge of Dragons

Format: DVD

Year: 1999

Label: Double DVD Pack ( unknown )

Wow! Seriously, this movie is something to behold. Dolph apparently wanted to do a proper action movie after his disappointment with the outcome of his previous film 'Sweepers' - and Bridge of Dragons is.....well it certainly has action.

Scanning the synopsis, I picked out Sci-Fi and Post Apocalyptic - I had to see this movie. When it begins, the text states that the story takes place where the future meets the past.

The first 15 mins are very confusing. First of all you think it's set in some Medieval / Robin Hood era, but then you see modern buildings - my first thought was budget restrictions, but then we cut to a navy seals / expendables type scene which plays out like an episode of the A-Team - lots of slo-mo jumping as explosions go off.

The direction was very strange. I couldn't quite place it. It was somewhere between 70s exploitation, Kung-Fu and Children's TV ( slo-mo action and zooms / dollies into faces, strange face pulling. ) It was unique, but at the same time it felt familiar. I will reveal more in due course.

The dubbing was bad, which is no bad thing. The actions was hit and miss - literally. The story was both formulaic and weird, Dolph's acting was good, but the other actors were comical. Having said all that, it was entertaining and the ridiculous world created was almost captivating. There were even glimpses of Terry Gilliam style flair - well maybe not quite.

After looking up the Director on IMDB, all became clear. I had seen this directing style before. Only ever in one place. The running in and out, the face pulling, the forced low angles and extreme deaths that somehow seem inoffensive.....Power Rangers!! It's the Director of Power Rangers!!!

This movie is laugh out loud bad. That is a good thing. It is also odd. Again, this is a good thing. It's like Rambo / Navy Seals / No Retreat No Surrender meets Time Bandits - directed in the style of Power Rangers on about the same budget as a single episode of said show. In one scene, I was almost hysterical as the same actors got killed 3 or for times each. Legendary stuff. I still haven't made up my mind whether it's a cult classic, but it shouldn't be left to fade into the ether. In fact I've just decided. It's a B-movie essential so go and find a copy right now ( probably about 20p inc postage on eBay. )
 

UK Films Rating: 7.5/10
Release Rating: 7/10 - Good 4:3 picture
Did Marc like it? Yes

Traceroute Movie Review

Title: Traceroute

Format: Online Screener

Year: 2016

Label: Monochrom

Here we have a documentary which probes the world of sub / alternative cultures, from techno geeks to biological artist, from alternative dildo sculptors to sometimes under-appreciated hollywood practical effects artists. It's a magical mystery tour.

Directed by Johannes Grenzfurther, this feature length documentary starts with some history about the director himself and how he became a bastian of geek culture.

Johanne soon reveals the true theme of the film - A road trip like no other. A jouney across the united states, stopping off at every, any and sometimes hidden geek havens.

Traceroute is gripping from beggining to end. There is a real sense of riding along with Johannes as he introduces us to strange new worlds.

Some of the places, subjects and people are bizarre, some insightful and some politically and socially challenging, but always fun. That is the brilliance of Traceroute. It's a social commentary delivered from a totaly new angle and with real flair.

Johannes is always opinionated, but always open with a real sense of self discovery. I loved every minute of this quirky film. There is such a wide veriety of subjects, tied together by the geek theme, that it feels fluid and expansive, much like the subject matter its self.

Traceroute is certianly the most original documentary I have seen, it's well researched, well executed and extremely well directed & edited. It's fresh and thoroughly entertaining.

I have only seen the online screener so I'm not sure if there are any extra fetures availabe, but to honest there really isn't any need for extras. I suggest that everyone should see this movie. It doesn't matter whether you are interested in geek culture or not - it's just a breath of fresh air.
 

UK Films Rating: 9/10
Release Rating: 9/10
Did James like it? Yes

Soul Warriors Legends : Spiritual Showdown Teaser Review

Title: Soul Warriors Legends : Spiritual Showdown

Format: YouTube

Year: 2015

Label: Zion Studios

Written by Sean Badger & Dishaun Jones and Directed by Raul Urreola, could this short film add something new to the martial arts genre? Let's find out.

First of all, I must stress that this is a teaser trailer and as such cannot be analysed in the same was as a narrative film, but there is certainly enough contained in the 5 minutes to get a taste of the film to come.

This teaser film is essentially a fight scene. There are some guys in cars at the start, it's not entirely clear what their motives are, but soon enough, that is all forgotten as we are straight into some martial arts action. What feels strange to begin with is the elegant motion of the fighters - almost like performance art. 

The next thing that struck me was the lack of any impact hit sounds which are commonly found in action and martial arts films. That's when I realised that this was intentional and really added to the overall poetic and spiritual atmosphere.

The camera work is sympathetic to the momentum of the scene and the colour and lighting is excellent. The dramatic score really builds throughout and adds genuine anticipation.

As a teaser trailer I think this film delivers the goods. The stylistic shooting style and intriguing premise leaves the audience with unanswered questions as it should. I would have liked to have seen a little more character development, or just a taste, but as a short teaser it would have been a difficult task to squeeze in. 

I'm looking forward to seeing the full film as the unique atmosphere and shooting style really holds your attention and offers a new take on the martial arts genre.

 

UK Films Rating: 7/10
Release Rating: 7/10 - Good picture and audio.
Did James like it? Yes

Princess Movie Review

Title: Princess

Format: YouTube 4k

Year: 2015

Label: Witching Season

Here we have a horror short from Writer/Director James Morris and producer Michael Ballif. This particular film is episode two of 'The Witching Season' series. Each film is a self contained short story.

From the outset, this film ticks all the right boxes. The opening titles set the mood perfectly, creepy Halloween decorations hang in the wind of a lonely looking street. There is a real sense of atmosphere. The retro titles and subtle music score really build anticipation.

A mother and young daughter arrive at a new house and immediately we are presented with a shot that is reminiscent of The Amityville Horror. The feeling of unease grows as we are introduced to the interior as the plot is slowly revealed.

The acting is solid with a stand out performance by Emily Broschinsky who plays the daughter. As the story progresses and we delve into the basement and there are genuine spine tingling moments, shock and horror and the music score really gets the heart racing.

The direction is top notch, the camera movement is elegant and the audio superbly mixed. The subtle film grain and colour grade adds just the right amount nostalgia and best of all it is presented in 4k, which really does look excellent.

Although the concept isn't anything new, what we do have is a very well executed, thoroughly engrossing and genuinely creepy short which utilises the best elements of films like Amityville, Poltergeist, Childsplay and one of my favorite hidden gems - Fallen.

All in all this is an excellent film made by a group of passionate filmmakers and that passion shines through on the screen. I'm looking forward to seeing the rest of the series.

 

UK Films Rating: 8/10
Release Rating: 9/10 - Excellent picture and audio.
Did James like it? Yes

Stone Henge Apocalypse Movie Review

Title: Stone Henge Apocalypse

Format: DVD

Year: 2010

Label: Anchor Bay

From the mind of Paul Ziller, the director of 'Beyond Loch Ness' comes another mythical TV movie with a lot of fake British accents, ridiculous locations and CGI stones. But it can't be all bad, can it?  

To be fair, this is a TV movie. It's a low budget TV movie. I'm not sure which station is was made for but I would say that it probably filled it's criteria.

The acting is actually petty solid, which is quite a compliment considering that the amount of psudo science dialogue is mind numbing at best often bordering on annoying. 

The whole thing is generally shot well. The non CGI sets are passable and the lighting is pretty good. 

The main problem with this movie is that most of the most dramatic apocalyptic scenes are not seen. We experience them from within a control room - I understand that the budget dictates this point, but a few external shots with a bit of panic and carnage would have helped a lot. Added to that, the fact that there is no real Bad Guy - A few are introduced towards the end, but they have very little menace about them. 

The music works well a and the action scenes also have sufficient urgency and pace.Misha Collins does an OK job in the lead role, but he is not very charming or intreguing. The role was acted very seriously which I think was a big mistake. 

If the character had come accross a little lighter ( I'm thinking Cristian Slater / Micheal J Fox style ) or geeky like The Librarian or more of a rogue like Indiana Jones - Basically if he was given a character it would have improved the film massively.

This film is a Stargate / Independence Day / 2012 wannabe and falls short in almost every respect. Pure budget TV fodder. Worth a watch? No not really. It's bearable. That's about the long and short of it.  

UK Films Rating: 3/10
Release Rating: 7/10 - Good picture, Making Of included.
Did James like it? No

 

The Death Merchant Movie Review

Title: The Death Merchant

Format: DVD

Year: 1991

Label: 1st Miracle Pictures

Here we have a strange action thriller from Director James Winburn... Who? What is it with all the stunt coordinators making z movies? Well anyhow, here is another one. Not all terrible - but very hard to like. The story is OK, the cast are pretty good and the direction is just about passable. If you look past it's flaws, is it worth the effort? Let's take a look...

The lead character seems to be the villain called Ivan played by the late great Lawrence Tierney. And quite rightly so. He has the presence and the pedigree to carry this film, which he just about manages to do.

The story is a bit messy but essentially, an archaeologist finds an artifact with supernatural powers. Ivan wants it. We are then introduced to lots of forgettable characters who also want it.  

The worst thing about this movie ( and to be honest, there is a lot not to like ) is the sound mix and music. At times the music is mixed out of sync with the following loop, there is also an awful echo effect used at various times on dialogue, effects and music which is totally distracting and downright annoying. I think the sound mixer Jack Lindauer must have acquired a 1970s copycat echo machine and was intent on using it.

There is no need for anyone to watch this movie. It's a mess. Where films like aquanauts embraced and exploited their low budget trash audience, The Death Merchant just pisses them off. Not ridiculous enough to be a worthy b-movie and not executed well enough to be a passable TV movie.

UK Films Rating: 2/10
Release Rating: 4/10 - Picture ok, trailer included.
Did James like it? No

Aquanoids Movie Review

Title: Aquanoids

Format: DVD

Year: 2002

Label: Screen Entertainment

Wow! I will sum it up now and work my way backwards - Stupid, Awful & Brilliant in equal measure. This is very low budget trash cinema for the die hard trash cinema fans. The general viewing public will undoubtedly turn this movie off after the first 2 mins. BUT...if you like trash cinema and stick with it, it's actually a fun movie.

It's a classic B-Movie creature feature done pretty badly but almost unashamedly. It's Jaws meets, Piranha meets Zombie Lake with lots of static camera shots, terrible acting and dodgy framing.

I can see I'm not selling it so far....On the plus side, the gore FX & makeup are brilliant, the music works well and there are a few characters and actors that lift the production just enough to pull you in. 

The lead actor is a busty blond, who gives it her best shot but falls short, by a long way. In fact, she struggles to talk and move at the same time for the most part. The lead male only features in the film for about 30 seconds at the beginning and 30 seconds at the end. If the director had gone with him as the lead, the movie could have been a cult classic. 

There are creatures in the bay that attack swimmers. That's pretty much it. The stand out characters are the mayor and his side kick played by Edwin Craig ( Batman ) and Ike Gringrich ( None worth mentioning )

This duo work brilliantly together as the villains who must put a stop to these melding kids before they ruin their plans to build a shopping centre in the cove.

The direction is pretty poor, even by trash standards. Lots of static badly framed shots and unnecessary cut shots. There is a lot of underwater footage which is actually pretty good and definitely adds production value. There is a nod to Roger Corman films and their Italian knock offs which is nice. This kinda sums it up. This movie is a knock off of a knock off of a knock off.

I must say that I actually enjoyed this movie. There were even a few laugh out loud moments - mainly due to the horrific acting and stupid dialogue, but I guess that's kind of the whole point of these type of movies. Megashark, sharktopus etc have just polished the turd, or trash, as would be the case. I would not recommend this to anyone other than z-movie enthusiasts - if that sounds like you, then I thoroughly recommend Aquanoids.

UK Films Rating: 5/10
Release Rating: 5/10 - Picture poor, but trailers included.
Did James like it? Yes

Killersaurus Movie Review

Title: Killersaurus

Format: DVD

Year: 2015

Label: 88 Films

Back to some good old home-grown B-Movie goodness with Killersaurus from prolific low budget filmmaker Steve Lawson ( The Silencer, Survival Instinct.. ) The entire movie was shot and edited in a matter of weeks on a shoe-string budget. Made to cash in on the release of Jurassic World maybe? Probably, but who cares? The question is: is it any good? Well let's take a look...

 

The story is simple and ridiculous, just how we like them. A group of scientists make a dinosaur, a shady government agency is involved and then it all goes wrong..so far so good. The number of lead actors is limited to a small hand few which allows Lawson to develop the characters just enough in the limited time. And the time is very limited. The run-time states 75 mins, but if you take away the credits, we're looking at around 1 hour. 

The production and direction are excellent considering the budget and grueling shooting schedule. The small number of locations, coupled with the use of dark backgrounds, smoke and light effects help to add a sense of claustrophobia, but this is my main gripe. After a while, a change of scene to somewhere with a wider or deeper viewing plane would have added a nice contrast to the dark research labs.

The acting is solid for the most part, with all actors delivering a stern performance. The stand out performance was Kenton Hall, who managed to add a little extra lightness and depth to his character in a pretty contrained environment. Overall the movie feels like a Pilot TV episode for a Sci-Fi channel series ( and that's not a bad thing)

The Dinosaur it's self is not your usual CGI nonsense. This one is real ( or at least it exists in the real world )- It's a model. I must say that I much prefer it this way. Yes it looks dated, but it works, and actually adds production value and a novelty factor if nothing else. The other thing I really like is the use of music. The soundtrack really drives the pace and drama throughout the movie

Despite it's limitations, Killersaurus works. It cannot be judged alongside it's Hollywood peers. It cannot be judged by B-Movies of the past. It's a super low budget movie shot in the midlands in a few weeks with a skeleton crew. I think Creativ Studios should be commended for sheer efficiency and genre hoping ability. What genre will they tackle next? I can't wait to find out.

UK Films Rating: 5/10
Release Rating: 5/10 - Good picture. No extras.
Did James like it? Yes

 

 

T-Force Movie Review

Title: T-Force

Format: DVD

Year: 1994

Label: ILC

A change of pace now with some 90s Sci-Fi Action with... T-Force. Now the first rule of B-Movies, in fact the only rule of B-Movies is: Make the artwork a million times better than the movie. They got this one completely wrong. This movie should thank it's lucky stars that it found me because no other person on the planet would watch this movie based on this crappy cover. It's a shame because it could have had truly epic artwork and the movie is actually pretty good.

A simple story set in the near future. A group of Robocops go off the rails and turn into Terminators. 90 minutes of gunfire, explosions, robot components, boobs, corny one liners, male bonding, buddy cops, helicopter battles and dune buggy chases ensue. There isn't very much else to say. Why has this film not been given the love it deserves? Because of that god awful artwork! Did I mention that before?

I really liked the direction on this. Some really cool angles, nice dramatic dolly shots reminiscent of the 80s Italian zooms and some well executed chase sequences. The effects are also very impressive for the most part. We can ignore a little tin foil here and there. As a poor man's Robocop/Terminator/UniversalSoldier/48hours/Raw Deal, this pretty much hits the spot.

The acting is fine and the writing is pretty decent. It does weave in a little sentimentality and hints at some deeper Bladerunner style moral quandaries, but soon discards those notions in favor of cheap gags - and all the better for it I reckon. The only thing that I wasn't keen on was the T-Force costumes. Not tacky enough to be cool and not techy enough to be plausable, but whatever.

That about sums it up. I'm sure the Director would have liked to make the world feel a little more futuristic in a total recall style, but he did a good job overall. There are some decent little virtual reality and holographic gadgets which help set the scene. So to summarise I'd say it's a poor man's Robocop/Terminator/Universal Soldier/Raw Deal and I like it. A hidden gem.

UK Films Rating: 7/10
Release Rating: 5/10 - Good picture. No extras.
Did James like it? Yes